your perfection is perfectly clear to me.


it's feels nice to cut the last tie that I have to yesterday. because today, tomorrow and next week are looking pretty sweet.


i should have stayed..

When it comes to money it's only from one extreme to the next. I'll either pinch every penny I have because I'm convinced that if I don't I will suffer some horrible, financial crisis.. Or instead of paying bills I go get something pierced.

Incubus is playing in VA Beach mid September and i'm going to try to make that show. It will still be nice outside and everything is cheaper off-season. I'm thinking surfing, seafood and a drunken delight of a concert. God knows I'm dying to get to the beach this year and this may be the best excuse yet. Plenty of time to save up some cash so I can have a bangin two days.

Andrew is asleep upstairs and I really want to be next to him but insomnia lately keeps me awake.

Screw it. Tomorrow I'm getting an industrial piercing. Why? Because that's what us badass girls and boys do.

Feeling anxious and angry lately. Even though I attribute these negativities to hormonal imbalance.. Tomorrow I'll pick up where I left off in the Bible. Speaking of the good book, you can choose to ask questions forever. Questioning, reasoning, "logic." What's logic? Running in a wheel searching for a reason to believe or proof that God exists? Or just finding faith and letting that one and only being make everything better? You can keep your questions. I'll keep my content.

God doesn't create the disasters this world faces. Poverty, war, death, destruction> these are manmade problems. God gave us life and this world. With such a gift I would think there would come some desire to care for it. If a girl's grandmother gives her a gorgeous snow globe, no matter how fragile or resilient.. If she drops it and breaks it out of carelessness, should she blame the grandmother? No. God did his part and it is pure ignorance to assume it is his fault for the problems we inflict on ourselves on this planet. When we're given something valuable we should handle it with care.

Sleep.

what am i DOING?

dance of the manatee.

We marys had ourselves a ball,
Oh, yes we did,
We marys had ourselves a ball,
I must admit,

Hang us those limbs, hold no virtue,
Those told to hold: Project on my cue,

Until we fall.

(addicted to this song. )

FEELING PRETTY restless lately. unless we're together. i need to practice amusing myself in solidarity. i used to be really good at that..

"you don't look a day over fast cars and freedom." 


i just came to say, "hello."

oh oh oh. 

i wish someone could make up my mind. only one thing i know for certain. but love doesn't pay the bills. what do i want to do? who do i want to be? 

bon iver and st. vincent- roslyn

everything reminds me of you.   

 

arms.

I never thought that you would be the one to hold my heart
But you came around and you knocked me off the ground from the start

You put your arms around me
And I believe that it's easier for you to let me go
You put your arms around me and I'm home

I hope that you see right through my walls
I hope that you catch me, 'cause I'm already falling
I'll never let a love get so close
You put your arms around me and I'm home. -christina perri

I'm so in love with you.

literally. bullshit.

text me at 12:30 in the morning, while you're drunk, to rant absurdities? I dislike everything about you. The small ounce of sympathy I had left reminds me of stomping on a ketchup bottle and watching it squirt all over the wall. You're vile and not even worth these key strokes.

After tonight the visual legacy of Harry Potter is over. The last one. The ending. Soon after will come my HP tribute tattoo! Seems silly to some I suppose but Harry Potter has been a big part of my adult life. Call me nerdish but this interest turned obsession will always be around.

I'm happy. Thank you Jesus for everything you do for me. Thank you for giving me the strength to lay back down instead of escaping into an indulgent anger. The sleep was beautiful. Thank you for whoever canceled their ticket order last minute and allowed me two tickets to the midnight HP. Thank you for my wonderful, new boyfriend who already makes me feel, well, perfect. <3 love you drew.

-aliciabeth

today i stood in the pouring rain. my eyes rained on their own accord.

already a productive day. why is it that individuals such as myself feel so good about accomplishing acts that we realize are mundane?

i was getting gas last night when i noticed a bug on my car. i'd never seen one like it. lime green, clear wings. generally just interesting looking. so i leaned over and was staring at it, staring at me when i realized that if anyone was watching me they'd assume i was strange. but what's strange to me is that people don't have as much interest as they should in the world around us.

a productive day to most is waking up on time, heading to work, paying bills, etc etc. Productive to me could be, playing with a child, hugging a puppy, telling your family you love them and witnessing a shooting star. among everything else, faith. because that's what has led me to this point of contentment. one in which i'm content with the "real world," and god's world.

-aliciabeth

literally all I think about. sure there is work, and family, and friends, and..

well, there's just you.

of greetings. and goodbyes.

sometimes things can really catch 22 if you know what I mean.


"pour me a heavy dose of atmosphere."

happy. sad. happy. sad.


it seems to me now that with faith you can do anything. sometimes all i want is to hold my head up. perhaps if i attached a stick to the back of my neck..

i like this thing. i'm going to use it more often.

load the truck. pull out. and don't look back. 

of. greetings. and. goodbyes.